Photo Mugs

A received a coupon via email for Shutterfly and decided to get photo mugs for Travis and I.  I got Travis a World's Greatest Dad mug.  It has a bunch of pictures of the two of them together on it.  For mine, I had three photos put on the mug: One of Aiden from the hospital, one when he was 1 and one when he had just turned 2. 

I spent a good hour putting those together and then realized that I'm going to have to do this again in a year so that we have stuff with Mila on them.  I looked at our photo wall and realized I need to make time to get family photos done when she's a month old and again later.  I've heard lots of people complain about how the second child in the family didn't get as much documentation as the first child did.  I always felt bad for them and made a sort of promise to myself to not short-change the second (or possibly third) child. 

Problem is, now that I'm here I can see how things like this can easily fall through the cracks.  When I was pregnant with Aiden, I had all the free time in the world to dawdle over the pregnancy.  This time, I feel like it is flying by so fast.  I have been making an effort to record details about this pregnancy, but not near as much as I did with Aiden.  I have a feeling this will only become more so when we HAVE Mila.  That won't stop me from trying though. 

After spending an hour or two looking through photos of Aiden when he was first born I went to bed and had my first dream about Mila!  I dreamt that my mom was so excited to have her that she took her to my aunt's house to show her off for the night.  At the end of the night, Travis and I came to pick her up.  My mom brought her out to our car.  I was sitting in the back seat.  I rolled the window down and my mom handed me the Mila bundle through the window.  Then Travis drove off with me holding her.  I looked down and she looked exactly like Aiden did. 

It was a very serene dream.  I forgot how vivid dreams can be during pregnancy.  So much so that I am able to remember them for days or weeks even.  Thankfully none have been nightmares.

We got our mugs in the mail at the end of last week.  I had originally planned on bringing my mug to work.  I could show off pictures of my kid and ensure that no one would walk off with it.  It's hard to explain why someone else would have a picture of my son in his PJ's riding his horse-on-a-stick.  But then the thought of losing the mug or breaking it at work freaked me out.  I think I'm going to keep at home for a little while.  This way I can make sure to enjoy the mug for a bit before risking losing it. 

I used to think people who had pictures of their family on stuff were weird.  Now I'm one of those weirdos.

Time to slash something

A couple nights ago I had a dream so real that when I woke up I was seriously upset. I dreamt that I was pregnant with our second child. I gave birth and after the delivery the doctor said there was a problem. I don't remember what it was, but he said there are two options: Medicine that might not work or just do a hysterectomy. I was so worried about dying that I immediately chose the hysterectomy. After I'd had the surgery I was laying there in the hospital bed when I realized that I'd only had two children. I wasn't sure if I wanted to have a third child or not. With that decision taken away from me, I was panicked and upset. I couldn't believe that I'd thrown away that option later in life without even thinking about it.

Dream interpretation websites say this dream may represent the need to slash something out of my life, like a habit or something of which I need to let go. They actually used the word 'slash'. Eesh.

Still a Little Grey

I had a VERY strange dream the other night. I dreamt that Travis and I got pregnant. We didn't want to get pregnant until July, so we decided to get an abortion (which is ridiculous because there is no way I would get an abortion because the pregnancy was six months earlier than planned). I went in for the procedure alone. Thankfully I didn't actually dream about the procedure itself. (Yikes!)

When it was over, I started to walk home. I needed to stop at the grocery store for something, so I walked under the overpass to a little convenience shop. It was a little one-story, stand-alone building in the middle of a strip mall parking lot. I walked inside, but it didn't look like a store. It looked more like a conference room with grey carpet, grey chairs, a big, wooden, oval table and a projector screen on the back wall.

I was confused for a moment, but then saw a sign that read "Enter Here" and it pointed to the elevator. As I was getting on the elevator, I had a thought that this was a one story building. Why would it have an elevator? It started to shoot upwards, but then the door opened and showed the original room I had started in. The entire room was going up.

Then a man in a grey suit with a grey tie and brown hair stepped out of a door across the room from me. He was coming out of a bathroom, drying his hands with a towel like he had just finished washing them. He walks towards me and says, "You were going to have twins. But don't worry, the abortion didn't take fully and you are still going to have Sam. She's coming soon. Don't worry."

Uh, what?! That was by far, the creepiest dream I have ever had. I've had scary dreams, I've had sad dreams, but that one was just plain creepy.

I've been thinking about that dream since then. First off, if I ever have a girl, we're not naming her Sam. No offense to all the Sams out there. That one is just not for me. Second, what the deuce?! The whole thing is just weird. When I think back on it, the guy was slightly reminiscent of the Geico commercial guy, but that's not what I was thinking during the dream. During the dream, I was horrified that I was going to have twins but I lost my chance. ??????

I think I'm getting the baby bug again. It might be because I still watch 16 and Pregnant occasionally. It might be because the newest Ramby baby is turning into an irresistible little chubster. It might be because my friend Linsey has a swollen belly of her own, due in April. It might be because my other friend, due in March, is about to have her baby shower. I LOVE baby showers. I'm just not sure. Alexa told me that something clicked in her when her firstborn turned 18-months old. She suddenly wanted another baby.

Originally, Travis and I had planned to start trying for another baby when Aiden turned one. When that was only a few months away, I freaked and had a talk with Travis. Neither one of us was ready for another baby just yet. I was just getting my body back to normal after finishing breastfeeding and I really couldn't imagine taking any of our time away from Aiden at that point. I still wanted to spend all my time with him and it seemed wrong to take any of that away from him.

We decided to wait until the following year to see how we felt then. Well, it's the following year and Aiden just turned 18 months old. I feel the bug coming on. I'm not quite ready, but I am happy to see it's happening. I was worried that because I didn't want a baby when Aiden was one that I would never want a baby again. But now I can see it. It's a possibility that appeals to me. I still worry a bit about taking time away from Aiden, but in the same token, I would be giving something to him. A play pal for life!

Shorties

The other day, Travis was at the back door calling Callaway to go outside with him. Callaway came barreling through from the back of the house - and ran straight into the baby gate that was latched. Travis' response?

"Oooo, right in the face!"

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Travis and I were watching a program on the History channel about Cocaine in US History a couple nights ago. It said that in the early 1900's, cocaine sniffing became prevalent in the South. White folks quickly began accusing the "negroes" of becoming violent and raping white women whilst under the effects of cocaine, dubbing them "Negro Cocaine Fiends". It was soon made illegal to sell cocaine to "negroes", because at that point cocaine was not nationally illegal.

RIGHT. The black people hated whites because they were under the influence of cocaine. It had nothing to do with racial discrimination and the violence against blacks.

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Monday night, Aiden started crying in his sleep. He does this occasionally, but I guess Travis was unaware of it since he is gone working most of the time. When he took a step towards the door to go check on him (it really is a horrible scream), I told him to wait 5 seconds to see if he stopped crying because it was probably just a nightmare. Sure enough, Aiden stopped screaming immediately.

Travis wanted to know what the heck he would have a nightmare about.

Taking his bottle away from him, maybe? Not being allowed to play with the DVR? Being forced to eat PURE PEACHES with all their tartness?

My first baby shower?

I need to give a shout out to Heather, a friend from work (and her husband too, of course). I might as well have had a baby shower yesterday because the amount of stuff they gave us equates to a party's worth of gifts!

She gave us a bunch of hand-me-down items, including three bags full of clothes, two bags full of toys, a high chair, a car seat, a travel booster seat and some feeding utensils. Plus, she gave me a DVD and book to read about swaddling. (More to read!) She ALSO gave us a gift bag that contained a million receiving blankets, cute burp cloths, clothes, diapers, wipes and more. I cannot believe how much stuff she gave us. It's unreal.

I'm SO THANKFUL for all the awesome people we have surrounding us that are willing to help us out. It really helps relieve some of the financial tension that comes with having a baby. Thanks again!

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I have to mention a daddy dream here too. Travis told me that Friday night he had a dream that he went out and smoked marijuana and that he was going to get in trouble for it whenever he took a drug test at work. He was worried he was going to lose his job. Is that dad's way of freaking out about having a baby? Sounds like he's worried about not being able to provide for this family. Which is silly because he's working his ass off right now to make sure that doesn't happen. Maybe it's finally starting to eat at him?

More dreams of Lil Wodie

I had another horrible dream last night that involved lots of walking around thinking I had my baby in my hands and then I would realize I had absentmindedly set him down. Then I would spend the ensuing stressful minutes searching for him. Usually I would hear water splashing and expect to find him in a tub of water, but then I would reach him and he would be fine. It was a bird splashing in the bird bath. Or another child playing in a kiddy pool. Oh and one time I left him on the hood of some truck Travis was working on in the garage and he was covered in engine grease. Needless to say, I woke up STRESSED OUT.

According to What to Expect When You're Expecting (WTE), my nightmare could mean the following:

"being unprepared for the baby when he arrives can reveal the common fear that you're not up to being a mother."

Oh great. I don't feel that way 100%, but I have had some worries lately that we are not prepared for the baby. For example, read my previous post about still having ten million books left to read with less than three months to spare.

The first half of the nightmare was more of a pleasant dream. Travis and I took turns changing his diaper and clothes and then swaddling him in different clothes and blankets. He was so fragile so we each went slowly. I could even see his face. The strange part about that is he looked just like me when I was an infant. All of my friends' firstborns look just like the father, so I keep imagining that he will look like Travis. I hope Lil Wodie looks like Travis. How cute would that be?!

As for dreaming about life with baby, WTE says:

"Dreaming about getting ready for the baby and loving and playing with the baby in a dream is practice parenting, a way that your subconscious bonds you with your baby before delivery."

Making up for not being ready? This is so confusing...

Slumber Attack

I woke up this morning and started getting ready for work. I put on my ballet flats and was in the bathroom when I realized that my shoe was hurting my foot. At first I just thought it was because they were rubbing wrong, but then I remembered. Oh ya. Travis attacked me like a hawk in his sleep and scratched the top of my foot with his talons. AKA, toenails. I can't believe I forgot about being woken with a start around 3 in the morning because Travis put a 2-inch gash in my skin.

I pulled out some gauze, because the cut is too long for a bandaid and quickly came to find out that I could not efficiently reach my own foot. I can still put on shoes and socks, but I have to throw my knee out to the side to get around the belly. Since this cut was on the outside of my foot, I had to wake the hawk to help me attend to my wounds. It's not bleeding anymore, but I didn't think I would make it through the day with my shoe rubbing that scrape.

I slept like crap last night. I couldn't breathe out of my left nostril all night and when I got up for my mid-sleep pee break I noticed my left ear was plugged. So miserable. I guess this is a cold, because the glands in my neck are tender and I have a little bit of a nagging cough occasionally. Yuck.

I had another baby dream last night. I dreamt I delivered the baby and went two weeks before I realized that I forgot to breastfeed him. We had been feeding him. But it was with formula. I was so upset that my milk supply would be gone and I wanted to try starting up. Then I was confused because I realized I had never had the painful engorgement that everyone talks about when you don't breastfeed. So then I was thinking it must have only been a couple days since I had Lil Wodie. Even in my dreams I'm confused.

Last night was nice. Shannon was in town and needed a place to stay for the night, so she stayed with us. Travis worked a little late, so Shannon and I ate dinner together and then caught up on our lives as of late. Eventually we started watching The Incredibles. That movie is SO cute. I still want to buy it. I guess I have more of a reason to do so now that we have a child in our future. =)

Giganto-Nikki

Sunday night I had a horrible nightmare. I dreamt that I was fat. And then I woke up. No seriously. It was horrible. More specifically, it went like this...

I woke up on the floor in my parents old bedroom (the one they shared together before they got divorced). When I stood up, I was standing directly in front of a mirror. When I saw my reflection, I didn't recognize myself. I thought my reflection was someone else. Someone VERY round. Round face, round nose, round neck, round arms. It was like I had fallen asleep at this size, and then woke up gigantic. My clothes were way too tight for me and left indentations all over the place.

I woke up from the real nightmare and immediately ran to the scale. I am still riding at 150 - not the end of the world. Lately I have noticed you can see the minor weight gain in my face. I didn't notice that until I looked at some photos of myself from early last year. It's strange how I don't feel bigger (except for in the belly obviously), but I AM getting bigger. I didn't realize this weight gain was affecting me so deeply!

This weekend Travis and I went to JCPenny's and bought blinds for the nursery. They were 40% off, so good deal for us! Unfortunately, the windows in that room are a strange size, making the blind-buying process a little difficult. We ended up buying blinds that were 30 inches too long for the windows. That means Travis had to remove the bottom half of each set (for a total of three). Furthermore, one of the windows is about 7 inches wider than the widest set of blinds. To make up for this we bought two smaller sets and Travis is going to build a divider in the center so there isn't as much light let in on the sides.

Last night I ran up to Walmart and bought curtains and rods. Unfortunately, I bought the wrong length for the sheer curtains, so I have to go back to the store. I ALWAYS have to go back there to return or exchange an item. So annoying. Hopefully I'll have time to do that tonight.

Anyhoo, Travis hung the blinds, rods and green curtains up last night. We finally have privacy in the nursery! The curtains really help soften the room - not quite so echo-y. And now there's COLOR!! I will get some photos up as soon as I exchange the sheer curtains...

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PS - My mini-videos from Blair's birthday party appear to be working now if you'd like to check them out on Vimeo.

Furniture Complete.

The nursery furniture is complete! We still need to get the co-sleeper and rocking chair for our bedroom, but we still have four months to purchase that.

Friday night, Travis put together the futon that we ordered from Target.com. I am very happy with our decision to put a sofa in the nursery. Friends of ours put a love seat in their nursery and I don't know that I would have thought to do that without seeing their idea. I love the fact that both Travis and I will be able to sit in there together and enjoy spending time with our son. Plus, as he grows, it will give us a place to sit to read books if it is not yet bed time.

The only downfall with this dark futon, which we learned very quickly, is that cat hair shows up GREAT on it. I know that cat and dog hair is an unfortunate side effect of owning cats and dogs. I was just hoping to keep this room pristine at least until the baby gets here. At the moment I have the door to the bedroom closed to keep the cats out. Sagira has been sharpening her claws on the diaper changing pad - another thing I'm not a big fan of. I liked being able to walk by the room and see his crib there. Now it's just dark at the end of the hallway. Damn cats.

I put up more photos of the nursery at Lil Wodie's BabySite, for those who are interested.

Another exciting development - I feel the little guy moving throughout the day now! I LOVE IT. It really is the coolest thing. He was moving around first thing this morning when I woke up, so Dad was able to feel him move before heading off to work. (I have to work this afternoon, too.)

My favorite thing is when he pushes his head into the side of my belly. It is the weirdest thing to see my lopsided stomach. I think I like it so much because I get a feel for how big he is and it's almost like I am holding him in my hands. I'm sure that sounds weird and/or creepy to most, but I love it.

The other night, I had another vivid dream about Lil Wodie. I was sitting down, watching my belly move. I pressed my hands down on my skin, to show everyone where he was kicking at and when I did that, it stretched my skin out. It ended up stretching my skin so much that it became transparent enough for me to see the baby. All my baby books say that his skin is still mostly transparent at the moment because he does not have skin or hair pigment yet. Interestingly enough, in my dream Lil Wodie's skin was transparent too. So I could mostly only see his bones. Again, in this dream I was not frightened or worried about this whole situation at all. I was just in awe that I could see my baby. After the light came in from the outside, it woke Lil Wodie up. He opened his eyes wide and stared at me. Then he smiled!

My dreams are weird.

17 Weeks: Prego Dreams

The other night I had a dream that I gave birth to Lil' Wodie. I was far enough along in the dream, so it was healthy timing. I had to wait for the labor to progress enough before I could started pushing. While I was waiting, I fell asleep. The weird thing is that I then had flashes of waking up and the doctor running in to deliver the baby, in between sleeping. When I finally woke up, I was not pregnant anymore. I was confused that I had missed it all so I asked Travis what had happened. He said that I was so tired that I slept through the whole 4 hours of labor and delivery. I asked him why I didn't wake up from the pain and he said he knew I wanted an epidural, so they did it, all the while I was sleeping away.

After coming to the realization that Lil' Wodie was out here in the world, I wanted to see him immediately. Unfortunately for me, I spent the rest of the dream trying to get to the nursery. I wanted to visit my other friend in the hospital who had her baby that day too (who was a random girl from high school - weird), so we did that on the way. I never made it to Lil' Wodie by the end of the dream.

Pregnancy dreams can be very strange. This is the first one I've had about giving birth though. I wonder what it means?

I had my OB/GYN check up Monday. Everything is going fine so far. The baby's heartbeat is down to 162bpm, which is normal. I have had this strange hardening of my stomach several times in the past week and I was talking to Alexa about it. She said that she started having Braxton Hicks contractions when she was 12 weeks pregnant and maybe that is what I have been having.

I told the doctor about it at my appointment. She said that it is uncommon, but possible to have these practice contractions throughout the pregnancy. Most women don't get them until the third trimester. I don't know if that is what I am having, but it is definitely a strange sensation. I made Travis feel it last night to make sure I was imagining it. I wasn't, by the way.