Thursday, May 3, 2012

Pregnancy Pet Peeves

There are a lot of things I have heard pregnant women complain about when it comes to dealing with society their interest in a woman's pregnancy.  Up until this past month, not much bothered me.  But lately, there have been several things that just hit a nerve.  It could be partially that I have a sudden irrational short fuse these days.  Or it could just be that I'm tired of hearing the SAME thing over and over again.  Here's the list of things Nikki is less tolerant of:
  1. "You're having a boy, aren't you?"  Nope.  Despite originally thinking I was going to have a boy, the doctor says with 99% certainty that this is a girl.  I don't care what you know about how when it's a boy, the belly goes out front and when it's a girl, the belly goes all around like a tire.  I think every woman carries child the way her body is equipped to do so.  I do not thing the shape of the baby's genitalia has anything to do with the mother's body.
  2. "You're going to pop any day now, huh?"  Nope.  People have been telling me that for a month and I still have 2-3 weeks left.  When I tell them that, they usually say one of the following: "Are you having twins?!" or "You're going to have the baby early!"  Again, nope.  Just one baby.  All three ultrasounds agree on that one.  And again, nope.  If my first delivery is any indication, this baby is going to hold on as long as possible.  Premature babies do not run in my family.  If anything, well developed, large babies run in the family.  Honestly, the reason I'm so big is because I have a lot of amniotic fluid.  Tell me random-person-on-the-elevator, do you really want to discuss how much fluid is in my sac?
  3. Getting the stink-eye while carrying a coffee.  My doctor said one cup of joe per day is fine.  Besides, what if it's decaf (which sometimes it is)??  I shouldn't have to defend myself.  The end.
Beyond these three bullet points, I have hadn't too many issues.  No stranger has tried to touch my belly.  Only friends.  And I'm okay with that.  Oh and no one has tried to kiss my belly.  Thank goodness for THAT.  I had a stranger do that to me on the beach while I was in a bikini last year.  That means a random hippie chick kissed my bare skin while I was all hot and covered in sunscreen.  NOT OK LADY.

2 comments:

Sara's Satire said...

Bwahahahahaha!
1. I agree - 100% everyone is different, I happened to go out in front with Logan and all around with Landry...although I was more like a Monster truck tire instead of a regular tire, however I have known plenty people who have gone straight out and had a girl. Now, I will say I tend to believe more in my own gut feeling about my own body than a sonogram (but that is because of my own personal experience). If you remember...when you first told me, I told you it would be a girl...of course, I am right 50% of the time HA! Plus, when you say that you are operating on such a short fuse, I feel like that's further proof that you are having a girl.....extra estrogen and all that!! LOL
2. I agree 100% - This has to be the most common and yet most insensitive thing that people say to pregnant women. As if by some miracle a second baby all of a sudden appears during the 8 month, or that you have somehow gone 8 months not knowing whether or not you are having one or two babies. Pregnant women gain weight and obviously their bellies get bigger...but I seriously HATE when people act as if you should stop getting any bigger after the 6th month. I always want to slap the hell out of people who make comments like that.
3. Drink as much coffee as your doctor advises, I don't know if it's because I love you so much or because I am in an irritable mood as well, probably both - because I am so offended for you! I want to go with you to work one day and just act as your body guard. The next time someone gives you the stink eye just flip them off!

When I was pregnant, I always watned to say something really mean back, and I actually did a couple of times towards the end with Landry...when I got the "You're about to pop" comment I replied to a lady at Target, "well, I'm pregnant! What's your excuse!" Of course, I was really embarrassed that I said it out loud, but I was so mad...so I just left my basket and left the store. I didn't get anything about coffee, but the most common one was people asking if I thought I should really be holding Logan in my condition...ughhh pissed me off!

Anyway, hang in there. 2-3 more weeks to go, and if you want to go off on someone, just do it - you will probably feel better, and you can always blame it on pregnancy hormones later on! LOL

Not-So-Perfect Parent said...

Oh, Nikki, we should write a book together... I could go on for pages...